• Home
  • About Us
  • Endorsements
  • Helpful Resources
  • Your Turn to Share

Journeys To Mother Love

~ Encouragement and healing in mother/child relationships

Journeys To Mother Love

Tag Archives: Family

Much Ado about Nothing but Love

05 Monday Nov 2012

Posted by Christina in challenges of motherhood, the healing journey

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Family, motherly instincts, Parenting

Image

I was worried. I was going to have Baby #2. But how could I possibly love another child like my first?

I had a two-year-old girl who had changed my life. I stopped working full time so I could stay home with her and take care of her. She got a lot of undivided attention! My parents moved close by from out of state to be near this red-haired baby. We mysteriously got more out-of-town visitors after we had a baby, too. My husband accepted a new job right around the time of her birth which brought in a better income and included insurance coverage for the family. Our whole world had changed.

Now there was to be a boy. How was I going to love him as much as my girl? Would she feel left out when I had a newborn to take care of? Would she feel just as loved as before? Would I be able to split my motherly love between two?

My second baby was so different from his sister. He was actually a much easier newborn. He slept through the night much sooner and was a happy baby. No wonder – he had lots of attention and help from his sister! He is a boy – and people have commented many times that he is ALL BOY! And our girl is quite the girly girl who likes best to wear glittery dresses and high-heeled shoes. She is artistic and creative and can always come up with ideas for what to do. She just loves to be with people. She uses great vocabulary words and can express herself very well. Our boy loves to dig in the sandbox and play with Legos and cars and trucks. Basically, he loves to be physical. Even now, I had to take a give-him-attention break to keep him from climbing all over me. But the most important thing to me? Our kids play well together. They love each other and they express it openly by saying so.

My kids know that I love them. I make a point to be sure that they know that – with hugs and kisses, with spending one-on-one time with them, making healthy dinners, reading together, saying prayers together, and going on walks, etc. If my parenting skills fall short, I will apologize and remind them that I love them. Even though I know there’s room for improvement on my part, they should feel pretty secure about that!

Of course, my anxiety was all for naught. For I found, that instead of needing to split my love between the two, God just made my heart grow bigger!

~Christina

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Email
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

APRON STRINGS & WINGS

03 Wednesday Oct 2012

Posted by arcecil in challenges of motherhood, leaving a legacy, the healing journey

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Family, Modeling the faith, Praying for our children, spirituality

(Photo: C. Lawton)

 

Many years ago when my children were playing about my feet, I wrote in my journal, “The desire of my heart is that my children live happy and full lives.” I thought of all the ways in which they could be nurtured so that they would have wings one day. I could encourage them, help them develop their talents, discipline them and pray for them. Then I realized one of the most important things I could do for my children was to model a happy and full life. In many regards, this last idea seemed like the most challenging of all the ideas I had that day.

As my children would need help on their journeys, I too have needed Someone to nurture me. There is a scripture that holds the answer: “Repent and be baptized, everyone of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for whom the Lord will call” (Acts 2:38-39).

(Photo: C. Lawton)

We are able to live out the best-possible legacy for our children because, as Christians, our sins have been forgiven! Our past sins can be the weight we pull behind us. Thinking on them can result in unhappiness. And as we have been forgiven, we are to forgive. If we don’t forgive those injustices that have been committed against us, that will become the weight we pull. We are forgiven and we are enabled by God to forgive. This then becomes the undergriding for a happy life with wings.

The second sentence tells us by entering in, we receive the Holy Spirit. He is the One who nurtures us. The Holy Spirit spoke to me that day when, after writing the journal entry, I realized the importance of modeling a happy and full life for my children. The work of the Holy Spirit refines our thinking, sifting out all those lies that make for unhappiness. He also helps us develop our spiritual gifts. Then our children can see a mom who is happy as she uses her talents for the benefit of others (Matthew 25:14-30).

Lastly, the above scripture directly links us with our children, for the scripture says: “The promise is for you and your children…” The promises God has given to us are more readily realized in the lives of our children when they are able to witness them in a mom who has embraced them. We cannot fake happiness; our children are great detectors of anything fake. We will never be perfect moms. (To project ourselves in such a way is to create another kind of burden!) But by the day-to-day, slow-and-steady work of the Lord in our lives, we can be moms who are able to give our children apron strings when they are needed, and who are then able to give them wings when the time comes. They can be confident in their ability to grow wings because their mom has a pair.

~ A.R. Cecil

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Email
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

The Gift of Faith

26 Wednesday Sep 2012

Posted by Kerry Luksic in childhood memories, the healing journey, when mom has alzheimer's

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Family, future hope, life stages, mother and daughter

A child praying

My mother wasn’t a big talker. She was too busy for idle chit chat—she was raising a small army of children. In my New Jersey hometown, Mom was a living legend, an incredible woman who spent her days raising 13 children. No, that’s not a typo—13!

From sun up to sundown, she was always working—baking five dozen of her famous chocolate chip cookies, finishing the lace hem of one of my sisters’ prom dresses, and juggling the daily carpools of after-school activities. Weeks would fly by in the daily flurry of activity. But no matter how busy life got, Mom always found time for God.

As a family, Mom had countless rituals to foster our faith. From saying grace before meals and requiring us to attend 7am Sunday mass to enrolling us in Catholic elementary and high school, she showed me and my 12 siblings that faith was the foundation of our family.

And with her steady stream of faith-based encouragement, Mom taught me to turn to prayer in any challenge I faced—no matter how trivial the challenge was.

On many occasions, as a young girl, I’d cry in desperation, “Mom, I’m going to fail my math test.”

“No, you’re not. Study some more and ask God for help—say some prayers ,” she’d reply.

As a moody 15-year old, I’d shriek, “Mom, I can’t find my necklace. I lost it. It’s gone forever. My life is over!”

“Say a few Hail Mary’s and don’t forget to pray to St. Anthony,” she’d suggest.

No matter what the situation was, Mom knew the answer, and most of the time that answer was found in faith. Through her lifelong encouragement of prayer, Mom taught me that God could fix all my “little problems,” and proved to me how faith could be a source of infinite strength.

When my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer during my senior year of high school, Mom remained the steady rock for my unstable family. Six months later when Dad died, Mom leaned on her faith and was unbreakable.

As I felt my heart break into a million pieces, and as I cried bitter tears of regret for all that was left unsaid between my father and me, Mom refused to shed one tear. Instead, she picked up the pieces in my shattered family—attending daily mass, saying the rosary, and maintaining her life-must-go-on attitude.

During those dark days, Mom’s unflinching faith became the source light. I watched my mom and knew that if she could keep moving forward despite having just lost her husband of 35 years—then so could I. Mom knew that we needed to celebrate my father’s life—instead of crumbling in despair.

Mom’s lifelong example of faith has proven to be one of her greatest gifts to me. When she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease eight years ago, I was devastated. I felt angry with God for “letting this” happen to her. But in time, I learned to follow Mom’s example—accept the things I can’t change, to let go of my fears, and to rely on my faith to cope with the heartbreak of Alzheimer’s—seeing someone you love slip away before your eyes.

Alzheimer’s isn’t an easy road for anyone. But by reflecting on my mother’s lesson of faith, I’ve learned to be present in her world and to savor the joyful moments I have with her.

Yes, it’s true—Alzheimer’s has stolen pieces of Mom from me. But I choose to focus on what remains, instead of what is missing. I treasure the gift of faith she bestowed on me. And I strive to pass this incredible gift along to my daughters.

~ Kerry Luksic

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Email
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

Perfect Parenting

10 Monday Sep 2012

Posted by finishingwell2 in forgiving mom, God as our parent, mother wounds, stepmom relationship

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Family, Forgiveness, Modeling the faith, Parenting styles

"Death Was Cheated" - newspaper clipping

Ellen was the “miracle” baby “born” after her pregnant mother died suddenly during a stroll in the park

My parenting style is very different from Mom’s and Dad’s. In Journeys to Mother Love I tell of being raised by a stepmother and only finding out when I was grown that she wasn’t my real mom. That was one of the disappointments and deceptions that I finally was able to forgive (with the Lord’s help), so that we could “finish well.”

When I had my own children, I was sure I could do better than my parents had. So I tried my best to give our children a firm foundation mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

In spite of my good intentions, I wasn’t the perfect parent, either. My children now tell me how they felt on the receiving end of my parenting. “You were strict,” they say. “You were really naive.” etc.

With experience comes understanding. When I was young, I couldn’t understand my parents’ viewpoint because I hadn’t walked in their shoes. Now that I’ve been a parent, too, I can look back and empathize with their struggles as they tried to make the best of what life had dealt them. And, it’s easier to forgive their shortcomings, as I hope my children will forgive mine.

My grown son encouraged me by saying he saw us seeking God and modeling Christ to him and his sister, day after day. And it’s because of that example, that he belongs to Christ today. That’s the best outcome we could have hoped for.

We can’t claim any bragging rights for that, though. God, the perfect parent, lit the flame in his heart and our daughter’s, too. Now, as part of His family, God is maturing them as only He knows how. Thank you, Lord.

~ Ellen Cardwell

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Email
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...

Our Common Interests

02 Sunday Sep 2012

Posted by vernahsimms in childhood memories, generations coming together, leaving a legacy

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Family

Generations coming together

Verna and her great-grandson

Despite over eighty years difference in our ages, my great-grandson, Luke, and I have a surprising amount of common interests. We both have a passion for water—whether wading ankle deep in the shallow crystal-clear creeks flowing in Missouri—watching minnows, or splashing in the rivers and swimming pools.

We both enjoy making crude figures from colored play dough, playing pretend and hiding from imaginary foes. He squeals in delight as I press a button on one of his modern toys and jump when it gives forth talking or loud noises of some sort.  I explain to him how my home works; and he is equally quick to tell me, when a particular toy doesn’t respond to my touch, that it needs batteries!

But most of all we love to talk!

One day as we were visiting, celebrating his 2 1/2 year birthday, we stopped to wash our hands together in the low sink in their guest bathroom. I soaped my hands and rubbed them together making a lather and then joined the two hands together and blew a bubble through the opening. “When I was a little girl I used to blow bubbles by cupping my hands like this,” I said.

Luke looked into my eyes and smiled, “When I was a little boy, I rubbed my hands together and made bubbles like this.” He blew into his cupped hands and a wee bubble appeared.

Yes, we enjoy each others’ company. As I returned his smile, I let my mind travel to the distant future and made a silent prayer in my heart that when he reaches the ripe old age of 83 he will remember me and share with his grandchildren about our fun days together and tell them, “When I was a little boy …”

~ Verna Hill Simms

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Email
  • LinkedIn

Like this:

Like Loading...
Newer posts →

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Read the book, "Journeys to Mother Love"

Learn more about the book.

Pages on this Blog

  • About Us
  • Blog
  • Endorsements
  • Helpful Resources
  • Your Turn to Share

Archives

Categories

Blog Contributors

  • arcecil
    • The Imperfect Job of Mothering
    • Storing Away Christmas ~ THE GOD BOX
    • Who Am I?
    • THE GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT
    • STAIRCASE TO A BETTER PLACE AND TIME
    • What? You Can’t Stop Crying
  • ardisanelson
    • A Mother’s Day Gift to my Sons
    • Sharing our Stories in Community
    • A Grateful Lesson in Letting go of our Children
    • The Blessing of ‘Imperfect’ Children
    • “You’re Just Like Your Mother”
    • A Journey to Brother Love, Part 2
  • Catherine Lawton
    • We Come Trembling
    • New Beginnings
    • Living Wounds
    • Loneliness
    • What? You Can’t Stop Crying
    • Faith in the Birthing Room
  • finishingwell2
    • Mom’s Cooking
    • Always a Mother
    • Postscript to “Finishing Well”
    • Perfect Parenting
  • good2bfree
    • A Mother’s Legacy
    • Grace to Broken Mamas on Mother’s Day
  • guestmom
    • Forgiving Yourself — and Your Children
    • If Your Child is a Prodigal
    • Helicopter Mom, You’re Creating a Draft
  • Kerry Luksic
    • The Gift of Faith
  • kyleen228
    • Dreading Mother’s Day
    • “Mom-ness”
    • The Power of Sharing Your Deepest Secrets 
    • Adopted Siblings ~ A Special Closeness
    • Walking In Faith Through Adoption
    • Honesty about Our Struggles is the Best Way to Help Each Other
  • lorittaslayton
  • Christina
    • Grandma’s Apron
    • Much Ado about Nothing but Love
    • Mother Love
  • vernahsimms
    • A Letter to Mom
    • A Gift of Flowers
    • A Game of Love
    • Our Common Interests

Abortion Adoption a heart filled with love and hope Alzheimer's disease Aunt authentic relationship celebrate Child Child Jesus Children Christian novel Christian spirituality Christmas Christmastime Courage to be honest Death Dream Emotional and spiritual captivity Emotional and spiritual healing experiencing Christ Family Family traditions fathers day Finding our identity Forgiveness Forgiving yourself friendship future hope giving and receiving God's promises God the Father Grandparent Gratitude Grief Loss and Bereavement Healing love healing of memories Holidays Holy Week Home hope Jesus kids leaving home letting go life's upward path life and death life stages Mary milestones Ministry Modeling the faith Mom Factor Mother Mother's Day mother and daughter Mothering mother love motherly instincts no false guilt or shame Parenting Parenting styles Peace and joy personal discoveries Post-Abortion Healing Prayer Praying for our children relationships Sadness Sandwich generation Sewing smother love spirituality Thanksgiving unresolved hurt White Christmas Women's Issues

Adopted children challenges of motherhood childhood memories confessing our need emotional needs encouraging each other expectations family gatherings feeling inadequate forgiving mom forgiving yourself frustration to freedom generational patterns generations coming together God's healing love God as our parent Gratitude grief and loss healing after abortion importance of prayer Learning to appreciate Mom leaving a legacy letting go of anger losing mom too soon Motherhood mother wounds Parenting reach out and touch the healing journey when tragedy hits

Brought to you by Cladach Publishing

Blog at WordPress.com.

  • Follow Following
    • Journeys To Mother Love
    • Join 90 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Journeys To Mother Love
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d bloggers like this: